The worst box art of 2013
5. Green City 2
There is only one way you can buy this game as an adult male: if you are accompanied by your daughter. Otherwise, Chris Hansen will be standing directly behind you when you turn away from the register. Nice try, dirtbag.
4. Chipper & Sons Lumber Co.
Move over, Animal Crossing--these Chuck E. Cheese-looking mofos are here to show you how to really water flowers and chop down trees.
3. Doodle Jump Adventures
Let's say I've never played Doodle Jump (which, truthfully, I haven't). And let's also theorize that I have no emotional attachment to this woefully minimal watercolor creature with a lazy eye (which, again, I do not). That essentially means that this is one of the laziest box arts imaginable, offering people like me literally no reason to give a second glance in this box's direction, let alone spend $29.99 on a $0.99 game. It's the modern-day equivalent of those piss-poor Mega Cartridge boxes.
2. Putty Squad
Because nothing highlights the power of next-gen hardware like CGI from 1994.
1. Zoo Park
This looks marginally better than a 5th grader's drawing. Either the artist decided to depict one of the rarest tigers to ever live with heterochromia iridum, or somebody done goofed and painted those eyes in wrong. Also, what better way to show off your animal sanctuary than in-game shots of a burger shack and restroom on the cover? AND OH GOD WHAT IS WRONG WITH THAT GIRAFFE'S FACE?!? It looks like it was dropped repeatedly on its head as a newborn, which is astounding because giraffes can't carry their young.
"HEY YOU GUYYYYS!" -the giraffe from The Goonies
Don't (always) judge a game by its cover
Those are the 50 biggest stinkers from 2013's wide array of box art. Think we were too hard on some? Perhaps others, like The Smurfs 2 (above) narrowly escaped humiliation? It's a tell-all in the comments below.
Want to mercilessly mock even more bad box art? It's your lucky day. Check out the worst box art of 2012, the worst box art of 2011, the worst box art of 2010, the worst box art of 2009, the worst box art of 2008, and where it all started: the worst box art of 2007.
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Lucas Sullivan is the former US Managing Editor of 12DOVE. Lucas spent seven years working for GR, starting as an Associate Editor in 2012 before climbing the ranks. He left us in 2019 to pursue a career path on the other side of the fence, joining 2K Games as a Global Content Manager. Lucas doesn't get to write about games like Borderlands and Mafia anymore, but he does get to help make and market them.