What if life gave 1000 Achievement points?
You're never going to Platinum real life
Your life is a video game
Living is the weirdest thing you'll ever do. You'll plop out of your mother, cry for a few years, wander around feeling feelings for a few years, cry for a few more years, and then repeat that same process until you die. It's strange. But just because it's confusing and sometimes horrible, there are many things you'll do in life that are worth celebrating. Many achievements worth... pointing out.
Which is why we've decided to turn life into a game. Some gamers act as though their Gamerscore is reflective of how accomplished they are as gamers, but now you can see how much you've Achieved as a person with this simple test. Here's what life would be like if it was broken into 1,000 Achievement Points, just like a video game--be sure to let us know what your IRL Gamerscore is in the comments below!
1G - You're off to a good start
Successfully survive being born.
25G - Ding!
Celebrate your first birthday.
5G - Use them legs
Crawling is for rookies, the real success is in this new "walking" thing you've invented.
10G - Soliloquize
You've said your first words. Time to learn profanity.
25G - MAKE A POOP
No more diapers for you! You're potty trained.
Sign up to the 12DOVE Newsletter
Weekly digests, tales from the communities you love, and more
7G - I want to ride my...
Learn to ride a bike--you only need to do this once!
3G - Why do we fall, Mr. Wayne?
Fall off your bike, and get back on.
10G - The first day of your life
Start school. Yeah, you need to do this for at least ten more years. Sucks to be you.
5G - That's why pencils have erasers
Fail a test in school.
Hollander Cooper was the Lead Features Editor of 12DOVE between 2011 and 2014. After that lengthy stint managing GR's editorial calendar he moved behind the curtain and into the video game industry itself, working as social media manager for EA and as a communications lead at Riot Games. Hollander is currently stationed at Apple as an organic social lead for the App Store and Apple Arcade.