SFX Spurious Awards Of The Week

Shatner turns diva, Dalektubbies come out to play, kaboom! and more... [WARNING: Contains Lost spoilers]

PHOTOSHOPPING OF THE WEEK
This incredible Teletubby Daleks image, created by talented SFX reader Mischa Welsh.

IRRITATING ACT OF GOD OF THE WEEK
For Eyjafjallajokull’s sake, the apocalyptic ash cloud lingering above Europe was a bit of fun at first but when it prevented our roving reporter Ian Berriman from meeting Matt Smith and put a dampener on Iron Man 2 ’s UK premiere it made us angry. And you don’t want to see us when we’re angry. Pens flying about everywhere.

DUET OF THE WEEK
Taiwan's version of Susan Boyle meets William Shatner. Words can’t describe. You just have to watch.

(WARNING! WARNING! LOST SPOILERS AHEAD)
WTF MOMENT OF THE WEEK

Ilana blew up? WTF!!! Fool us once shame on you, fool us twice… you know the score. Yes we all fell for the devious machinations of Lindelof and Cuse again but when it’s a moment so unexpected and sublime you can’t help but sit back and bask in the brilliance of Lost . It says a lot for the rest of the episode that by the end we’d even forgotten that this had happened.

MOST WORRYING TV SCHEDULING OF THE WEEK
On the sitcom Outnumbered , dad and son are arguing over what to watch on TV. Initially they’re watching Hole In The Wall but then switch over to Doctor Who Confidential . Now, hang on. That either means Doctor Who must have been aired before Hole In The Wall at about 5pm, or Hole In The Wall has suddenly moved up to an 8pm slot. Both of which are very disturbing developments.

TALENT SHOW CONTESTANT OF THE WEEK
If they all did this sort of thing we’d start watching Britain’s Got Talent . Maybe.

JAW-DROPPING SYNOPSIS OF THE WEEK
This one for the 2004 film Rectuma ( due out on DVD on 21 June):

“Waldo Williams is infected by a Mexican butt-humping bull frog, and soon his butt grows a mind of its own, as well as twenty feet in size, and terrorises Los Angeles. Now Waldo must prove his innocence by proving that his rectum is responsible for the murders and not him.”

EBAY LISTING OF THE WEEK
Bargain .

DVD COVER OF THE WEEK
Roger Corman’s Attack Of The Crab Monsters , out on 3 May.

Jordan Farley
Deputy Editor, Total Film

I'm the Deputy Editor at Total Film magazine, overseeing the features section of every issue where you can read exclusive, in-depth interviews and see first-look images from the biggest films. I was previously the News Editor at sci-fi, fantasy and horror movie bible SFX. You'll find my name on news, reviews, and features covering every type of movie, from the latest French arthouse release to the biggest Hollywood blockbuster. My work has also featured in Official PlayStation Magazine and Edge.