Why you can trust 12DOVE
A shoddy, self-aggrandising debut feature, Andrew Rajan's piss-poor romantic comedy is a witless vanity project. It's made by his company, Pants Productions, and stars the man himself as the apparently "very charming" Baggy, half of a porn-watching, stoner-loser bloke-housesharing set-up just begging, apparently, for celestial help. And lo, here it comes: Zeke (Shaun Parkes) and Paris (Susannah Harker), guardian angels ordered to help their charges but on no account harm or get carnally involved with them. Can you guess what happens next?
Rajan's script - co-written with another first timer, Tim Moyler - - is so predictable that all the film can hope to do is get by on blokish charm. Unfortunately, it doesn't have any. The earnest, cardboard performances are charisma-free, leaving the audience to relish Rajan's flat direction and the sickly redemptive-love subtext, which flounders badly on its own platitudes.
To be fair, there is one mildly amusing sequence in a Chinese restaurant, but it's the naff, self-indulgent pastoral sex scene and the wet-eyed finale that live in the memory. Irredeemable.
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