Nintendo's Big Secret
What famous franchise is headed to Wii this holiday?
StarFox
Probability: 50%
What is it?
Intergalactic space war with anthropomorphic animals! Seriously though, hopping into an Arwing and blasting the crap out of other ships while discovering hidden paths and bombing ground-based tanks was some of the most fun we’ve had on the last few Nintendo systems. Pioneering the Super FX chip and the N64’s rumble pack, StarFox goes beyond traditional arcade-y action with an emphasis on medal collecting and multiplayer mayhem.
We suspect the Arwing would control by holding the Wiimote sideways, with 2 being the primary blaster, 1 for bombs, A for Boost and B for brake. We even see the d-pad being used to call out squad tactics for regular cohorts like Peppy and the ever-annoying Slippy. (C’mon, he has to be in the game). And if we were developing, the on-foot and tank controls would use the Nunchuk to control and the Wiimote to aim where you shoot. Also, multiplayer is a necessity and if Nintendo got their online act together, we’d love a co-op single-player game.
Above: For crissakes - do a barrel roll!
Likely?
Not this winter. We don’t think StarFox is a big enough name to carry Nintendo’s holiday fever pitch. But Miyamoto waschatting about a Wil StarFoxto premiere Japanese gaming mag Famitsu a year ago, claiming how easy the Wiimote would be to implement. Also, a three-stage SNES StarFox minigame is included in WarioWare: Smooth Moves, presumably handling similar to how Miyamoto envisions. It’s coming, but we doubt this year.
Punch-Out W!!
Probability: 22%
What is it?
Ask your big brother if you don’t know, ‘cause Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out!! caused us many a heartbreak. We spent countless hours learning patterns as Little Mac - the scrappy up-and-comer - to knock out a colorful cast including Piston Honda, Bald Bull, Super Macho Man and Mike Tyson… before his various indiscretions had the game reprinted with Mr. Dream taking his place. We still pull this game out of the closet from time to time, to go one on one with Glass Joe.
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Above: This Mii will eat your children
We imagine a Wii-ified Punch-Out!! would - like all sports titles on this list - handle similarly to ultimate tech demo, Wii Sports. Punch by thrusting with the Nunchuk and Wiimote, while the height and angle at which the punches are thrown would dictate anything from a haymaker to an uppercut and even parries. Interestingly enough, EA Sports’ upcoming FaceBreaker is positioning itself to be a spiritual successor to Punch-Out!! - with comical, arcade-y action replacing the tiresome sim stuff.
Likely?
Not so sure about this one. Little Mac did appear as an assist trophy in Smash Bros. Brawl and Wii Sports controls would work so damn well, but it seems like FaceBreaker already beat Nintendo to the punch (pun very much intended). Punch-Out!! hasn’t even appeared on the Virtual Console, so we’re not really sure what the chances are it’ll come out. Hell, a cheap-ass Wii Ware update of the NES original would even be great.