New York Minute review

Why you can trust 12DOVE Our experts review games, movies and tech over countless hours, so you can choose the best for you. Find out more about our reviews policy.

With their saucer eyes and lithe, lanky bodies, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen have morphed from plastic moppets into strangely compelling women. They're a bizarre mirror-image spectacle that merits David Lynch's eye, but they instead get a tweener fantasy romp too threadbare for one Olsen, let alone two.

Straitlaced Jane and punker Roxy skip school, evade a truant officer (Eugene Levy, phone in one hand, cheque in the other) and chase their disparate dreams of Ivy League scholarship and rock stardom. No prizes for guessing if they'll fulfill them - even if the action is all set during one manic day in Manhattan.

Given the twins' pre-pubescent fanbase, it's odd that director Dennie Gordon overstuffs the action with underclad Olsens, the girls' sexy outfits sure to mean kiddies will be viewing a fair part of the movie through parents' fingers. Odd, too, that limo driver Andy Richter is allowed to adopt a stereotypical Asian accent that's sure to offend. Talk about puncturing the harmless, feelgood vibe.

NO VERDICT

The Total Film team are made up of the finest minds in all of film journalism. They are: Editor Jane Crowther, Deputy Editor Matt Maytum, Reviews Ed Matthew Leyland, News Editor Jordan Farley, and Online Editor Emily Murray. Expect exclusive news, reviews, features, and more from the team behind the smarter movie magazine.