Gaming's best #teamboneless characters
Because they don't need bones
#teamboneless, apparently
Right now, #teamboneless is trending on Twitter. Why? Because, for some reason, GameInformer's Dan Ryckert started an argument amongst the game industry about whether or not bone-in wings were better than boneless. It caught on, and now... yeah. Worldwide. Celeberties are weighing in, brothers are fighting against brothers--it's a blood bath.
But, of course, it made us wonder where gaming characters would stand. Here's a list of which game characters we know, for sure, would be on #teamboneless.
Blob (A Boy and His Blob)
Blob eats jellybeans, and nothing but jellybeans. We don't know what his favorite flavors are, but we know he'd likely be upset if a jellybean he ate had a bone in it.
Hanar (Mass Effect)
Floating jellyfish? Totally boneless. They're all floppy and... boneless.
Boo (Super Mario Bros. series)
They're ghosts, and though they have teeth (which, typically, means bones), they're not real teeth. They're ghost teeth. Thus, boneless.
Ditto (Pokemon)
Ditto can turn into anything, including a bone, but in his natural state he's a puddle of jelly. #teamboneless
GLaDOS (Portal)
Robots don't have bones. Metal bones don't count. We could fill this list with robots, actually, but we've just decided to name GLaDOS the queen of robots, so she represents them in the boneless category.
Earthworm Jim (Earthworm Jim)
Before he had a sweet space suit, Earthworm Jim was just a regular, boneless earthworm.
Slime (Dragon Quest)
Slimes don't have bones, or feelings, or souls. They just have eyes. Cold, dead eyes.
Vectorman (Vectorman)
Vectorman is a bunch of balls connected by polygons. Not a bone in sight.
Does Meat Boy count?
There are more, sure. We could have thrown in every plant, robot, and puddle of goop to ever be in a video game. Let us know what your favorite #teamboneless characters are, and be sure to thank us for potentially totally killing this joke mere minutes after it began.
And if you're looking for more, check out gaming's 100 greatest heroes and everything you need to know about Thief.
Hollander Cooper was the Lead Features Editor of 12DOVE between 2011 and 2014. After that lengthy stint managing GR's editorial calendar he moved behind the curtain and into the video game industry itself, working as social media manager for EA and as a communications lead at Riot Games. Hollander is currently stationed at Apple as an organic social lead for the App Store and Apple Arcade.