Imagine a world with no homophobia, where you can be exactly who you want, love exactly who you love, and do it all from a house decked out in Pride flags. For many LGBTQ+ gamers, this queer utopia comes in the form of The Sims 4, which celebrates its 10th anniversary on September 2, 2024.
The Sims has been queer from its creation, with same-sex relationships introduced in 1999 after a lesbian kiss was accidentally included in a demo. The release of The Sims 4 in 2014 marked the franchise at its most diverse, allowing same-sex marriage and adoption before many players could experience it in real life.
As someone who spent literally hours creating lesbian sims in rainbow-colored houses years before I had any idea I was gay, The Sims 4's proud and ever-evolving diversity has a special place in my heart, with updates allowing for more authenticity seemingly every single time I fire the game up for another nostalgic re-play. To celebrate the game's anniversary, I spoke to other LGBTQ+ fans to see how they're finding The Sims 4 after a decade.
Being yourself is "liberating"
"The Sims will have been one of the first ways in which I was able to play out some version of a same-sex romantic interaction," Isaac, a 24-year-old trans man living in London, tells 12DOVE. “I wasn't really aware of any LGBTQ+ media or TV shows or movies, but the way that I was able to access that kind of understanding [...] Would have been by having sims romantically interact who were the same sex.”
Recent updates have added further representation for trans and non-binary fans, introducing they/them pronouns after a petition to include them reached 25,000 signatures, gender-affirming accessories like binders, and gender customisation options like whether a sim can get pregnant or pee standing up.
"Being a trans man myself, just that little detail of being able to have that sim mimic the way I live my life, even in minute senses. I hadn't even thought about the fact that I couldn't do that before, but now I'm seeing myself represented,” Isaac explains. Isaac – who volunteers at the LGBTQ+ youth charity Just Like Us – says these new trans-inclusive updates will be "liberating" for young queer people to play with, especially at a time when many countries, including the UK and the US, are limiting gender-affirming care.
"When you don't have the opportunity to be yourself as you wish to be yourself in real life, the internet and video games [...] Are the best ways that you can live micro versions of that life that you wish to lead, you can understand what your future might look like," he adds.
Anna, a 22-year-old living in the UK, explains that The Sims doesn't just provide representation in adulthood, but can help players explore and affirm their identities from a young age.
"I play Sims a lot with my partner, and also my family as well, and it was a really great way to see how – early on with my sisters – all of us were completely chill with same-sex couples," they say. "I know for a fact my sister's making her sims of the same gender kiss, so she probably wouldn't be weirded out if I came back and was like, 'I have a girlfriend'."
Anna adds that while some of the more recent features have needed improvement – they/them pronouns were glitchy at first – they appreciated that LGBTQ+ families were part of the game from the start, with new updates like 'science babies' later added to the game.
"That's a great opt-in, as not every single couple can [conceive], whether they're cis/het or trans or same-sex couples," they explain.
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The Sims' representation has also grown beyond the game, with dozens of YouTubers and streamers creating careers out of the franchise.
Mollie, or The English Simmer, a YouTuber known for creating LGBTQ+ Sims content, describes the game as a "safe place where I could start exploring my own identity once I started to realize I wasn't straight", adding she "grew up knowing that two women could fall in love with one another because I had seen it happen so many times in the game".
"For the last 10 years of my content creation career, I've hopefully been able to give other LGBTQ+ people that space online to see themselves represented and know that them and their voices are important," she adds. “Hopefully The Sims will continue to keep introducing more and more content that allows as many people as possible to represent themselves in an accurate and positive way."
Stephen Works – who streams on Twitch under the name SpringSims – says Mollie's LGBTQ+ content inspired him to "craft stories like that in my own perspective", adding that The Sims 4 lets queer players create their "truly authentic self".
"Mollie was the first content creator that I knew who was part of the LGBTQ+ community, and she created storylines based off of her real life," the creator and podcaster tells 12DOVE. "With more representation being added with The Sims 4, a lot of streamers and content creators are making those storylines and sharing how they play The Sims in their way, and I think it's only made everyone happier, because when you're able to see yourself in the game, it makes the game more worthwhile to play."
Works adds that alongside aspects like Pride flag decorations – which he uses to "represent all of my sims and my own real life" – other forms of representation like "hairstyles, skin tones, binders, hearing aids, glucose monitors" has made the game "revolutionary".
EA's efforts at diversity and representation haven't always been so positive, however. The company was criticized in 2022 for its controversial decision to not release an LGBTQ-friendly wedding-themed expansion pack in Russia, where anti-LGBTQ+ "propaganda" laws are in place. This move was later reversed, and the pack was released in Russia with an 18+ rating.
There are still several improvements that could be made - for example, they/them pronouns aren't currently available for all languages, and I personally would love to see a Pride-themed specialized event or kit.
"Overall, I've been generally impressed with [the pronoun update]," Anna explains. However, "you still have to pick if your sims are male or female from the start, and the relationship system still only acknowledges male and female, your sim can only be attracted to men or women, or neither or both. I don't think it necessarily feels affirming to have to select 'male or female' when you're not one of those two things."
The Sims team confirms it is "always evaluating what's missing" and is "committed to adding new content that allows every player to express their unique self". Anna Huerta, The Sims 4's senior creative director, tells 12DOVE: "At The Sims 4, diversity isn't just a feature, it's a core value that shapes everything we do.
"Our development team is proudly diverse, with members from around the world, including many who identify as LGBTQ+. These perspectives ensure that the content we create reflects the richness of our players' identities and experiences - or even those they are curious to explore."
Huerta added: "We approach each project with the care and respect it deserves, understanding that no single experience can define an entire community."
Anna explains that while the game's LGBTQ+ representation is extremely positive, the best aspect of The Sims is allowing fans to create a world exactly how they choose.
"You can make your own LGBTQ+ story and it can fulfill whatever need there is in your eyes," they say. "You can go and have fun and create stories and relationships and people that look like the kind of person I want to be, the kind of friends that I want to have, the kind of community I want to be a part of. Or, if you want to make some really evil hot lesbians, that's also fine!"
"At the end of the day, honestly, it's pure joy,” they add. “We need more LGBTQ+ people being happy."
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