David Jaffe: Uncharted movie director is a "f*cking dick" and "trained monkey", but the film will be fine
Also, incisive Hollywood criticism featuring Photoshops of Arnie!
Mark Wahlberg, hmm? Excited about seeing him play a guy called Nathan inan unrecognisable film that just happens to have theword"Uncharted" in the title? No? Well don't worry. The Uncharted movie is going to be fine. David Jaffe says so.Twitterhas proven this. Yeah, he's called out Director David O. Russell as "a f*cking dick", and complained of stale Hollywood thinking when it comes to adaptations, but he still thinks it'll all be fine. We think. Probably.
Discussing the obvious issue that Wahlberg neither looks, sounds, or has ever acted anything like Nathan Drake, and that David O. Russell has recently developed an unusual neurological disorder which causes him toinvoluntarily describe the plot of National Treasurewhenever he tries to talk about the Uncharted movie, Jaffe sounds pretty chilled out. You know, like he usually does.
"I wish Uncharted fans would have faith", he word-squirted, "that Amy, the crew at Naughty Dog, and the peeps at Sony will only allow the Uncharted flick to happen if it lives up to the franchise standards. I get you may be suspicious of movie makers, but on the game side, none of those peeps I listed above have done anything to arouse suspicion that they are sell outs. Quite the opposite"
A fair point. The Naughty Dog crew are indeed one of the few teams blending mega-budget blockbuster game design with genuine nuance and artistic integrity at the moment. How much creative control is written into the movie contract though, is unknown. I'm guessing between "not much" and "HAHA! You want WHAT!?". As Jaffe himself admits, there are "necessary differences in entertainment mediums". That's something I'm always banging on about,usually in relation to bad video game storytellingthat apes movie conventions. Butchanging an entire plotand casting an unsuitable actor seemingly just because of star status? Seems unnecessary to me. And Jaffe, despite the above, seems to agree:
"At the same time, movie makers often get stuck in a tired way of thinking. In this case, the antiquated idea is: 'we have to have STARS to open the movie!' District 9, Lord of the Rings, Spiderman 1, and Avatar say 'hi'. Knight & Day, How Do You Know, and The Tourist also say 'hi', albeit with much less fervor"
Good point, well made. Thje idiotic obsession with big-name actors flies in the face of countless massive hits, yet Hollywood continues to roll with it. It's the same sort of thinking that butchers movies for the sake of cutting down the running time, while three-hour epics like Lord of the Rings, King Kong and Avatar do mega-money.
And as for the bit you really want to read, the bit where Jaffe goes all off the hook and gets sweary and up in someone's face like a big sweary man, it relates to this:
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Yes, that was Uncharted movie director David O. Russell gracelessly dismissing a fan's concerns. While making it quite clear he doesn't know who Nathan Fillion is. Breathe, internet, just breathe. I'm just going to let Jaffe run with this one:
"What a f*cking dick. I mean, given the guy's reputation, it's not surprising. If a fan comes up to you who is clearly interested in what you are doing - even though he may disagree with your way of doing it-there is a gracious way of handling it. And you should not only handle it graciously because it's good PR for your movie (especially when a f*cking video camera is in your face and your core fan base is super internet/youtube/viral savy) BUT because it's just good mother f*cking manners. On a Hollywood set and in a Hollywood agency you may be a big deal. Out on the street though, you are just a trained monkey who is there to entertain the people when they see fit (be it with movies or games or songs or comics). So f*cking stop with the attitude. I hate that shit."
You have opinions, you say? Opine away.