Chunkified

In case you missed the memo, Gears of War is friggin' fantastic. It's a no-nonsense shooter that'sbig, brutish and bloody.

We've crawled from our holes to bring you a list of the essential stuff that you absolutely have to check out on your first Gears of War session.

So, grab your COG togs and get stuck into the action...

Chainsaw
So, you've got this gun called the Lancer, right, and it's a good gun - it can waste Locust scum from a decent range and spits bullets at a rapid rate, but it's a cheeky little temptress that can get you in some seriously sticky situations.

You see, it's equipped with a chainsaw and, in case you didn't know, chainsaws on the battle field are fun. So much fun, in fact, that in moments that require cool thinking, you're overwhelmed with an irresistible urge to rev that baby up and charge in like a demented lumberjack in the hope of plowing a fleshy trough in someone's chest.

But, believe us, its well worth the risk for the carnage it causes.

Above: Carbide-tipped chainsaw teeth versus Locust flesh. Face it, there's only going to be one winner.

For ultimate satisfaction, sneak up on an opponent smugly manning a Troika gun turret in an online brawl and let them hear the buzzing sound of imminent death for a second before you plunge the steely, bloodthirsty teeth into their fleshy bits.

If walking away from a steaming pile of unidentifiable meat and bone doesn't make you feel like a real man, nothing will.

CATEGORIES
Latest in Gears of War
Key art for Gears of War.
Rumored Gears of War Collection reportedly includes campaign co-op for the OG Xbox 360 games, but no PvP multiplayer
Gears of War E-Day release date: A close-up of Marcus Fenix with his face covered in blood during the Gears of War E-Day trailer.
Gears of War: E-day will be co-developed by the 20-year shooter powerhouse that helped bring Gears, Fortnite, and one of the OG boomer shooters to life
Gears of War E-Day release date: A close-up of Marcus Fenix with his face covered in blood during the Gears of War E-Day trailer.
Gears of War: E-Day – Everything we know so far about the upcoming shooter
Gears of War: E-Day screenshot
18 years into the series, Gears of War devs confirm the original Marcus and Dom actors are "so back" for the prequel Gears of War: E-Day
Gears 5
Diablo 4 boss' plan for Gears of War 6 would've taken the series to space, but "we weren't going to start Mass Effect-ing this"
Gears of War: E-Day
Born out of a pandemic, refined through reflection: Gears of War: E-Day is a chance for The Coalition to recapture the spirit of Gears and "tear a lot of s*** up"
Latest in Features
The Witcher 3 screenshot of Geralt
Avowed and Kingdom Come: Deliverance 2 tap into the same thing that makes The Witcher 3 so compelling – and it's something I'm always looking for in RPGs
Marvel Rivals Spider-Man
Spider-Man has become every Marvel Rivals player's worst nightmare
The Punisher holding two machine guns in the rain
Daredevil: Born Again - Learn the bullet-riddled comic book history of the Punisher before he officially joins the MCU
A woman in a underwater machine waving during the cinematic teaser for Subnautica 2.
Subnautica 2: Everything we know about the new underwater survival game
The AMD Ryzen 7 8700G being held above a motherboard by a reviewer
AMD's pro-consumer 9070 strategies are exactly why it's primed to dominate the CPU market in 2025
Assassin's Creed Shadows cinematic screenshot
Assassin's Creed Shadows' transmog looks set to combine the best of Odyssey and Vahalla to make changing my drip easier than ever