50 Unrealistic Movie Life Lessons
When suspension of disbelief is no excuse
Jack Reacher (2012)
The Movie Life Lesson: If for whatever reason you are outnumbered by a gang of thugs intent on attacking you, don’t worry, you’ll easily defeat them as they approach you one by one.
Why It’s Impossible In Real Life: There’s no way a surly gang of wrong doers would wait patiently in line for their turn to beat seven shades of crap out of you. Pile on!
Harry Potter Series (2001 - 2011)
The Movie Life Lesson: If you’re born into a talented family and show no sign of skill in the same area, you’re practically worthless.
Why It’s Impossible In Real Life: As frustrating as the term “squib” in the Potter series is, it’s also a tad ridiculous. Judging offspring on the merits by which an entire family live their life is a bit selfish. If we all did exactly what our ancestors did then there’d be little to no innovation in new realms.
We'd probably not have egg slicers or another equally brilliant culinary invention.
Roadhouse (1989)
The Movie Life Lesson: Rise above capitalist tyrants and “be nice.... until it’s time to not be nice”. Yeah, it’s a bit muddy this one.
Why It’s Impossible In Real Life: Behaving admirably at work until someone ruffles your feathers, then beating them to the brink of death, wouldn’t cut it when it’s time for your annual achievement and development meeting with the boss.
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Fast & Furious 6 (2013)
The Movie Life Lesson: The human body can withstand a whole barrage of beatings (including a jet engine explosion at close range) and you’ll still be able to walk away with only a teeny headache and minor scratches.
Why It’s Impossible In Real Life: The amount of internal and external damage caused by continued combat and close proximity to a catastrophic explosion would assault you with a series of fatal injuries.
Click (2006)
The Movie Life Lesson: You can skip through the mundane elements of your life in order to realise what’s truly important.
Why It’s Impossible In Real Life: Alas, while Bed Bath and Beyond may provide a lot of life lessons (as in, can your relationship withstand a trip to it?) the life controlling remote is not available for purchase at this time.
The Family Man (2000)
The Movie Life Lesson: For true happiness in life, you can pursue either career success and wealth or love. Not both. Never both.
Why It’s Impossible In Real Life: Life achievements aren't always mutually exclusive. Raising a family costs money. Who’s gonna pay for those nappies? Those undeniable bonds of love between a family? No! Your paycheck.
Dirty Dancing (1987)
The Movie Life Lesson: Becoming competent at a particular skill only takes about a week to accomplish, especially if there’s a hunky instructor involved.
Why It’s Impossible In Real Life: To master any art, it requires steady rehearsal, practice and revision over a period of time. You can’t take a couple of dance classes and all of a sudden be Fred Astaire.
Animal House (1978)
The Movie Life Lesson: You can graduate from university without doing any studying at all and still become successful.
Why It’s Impossible In Real Life: Graduating from university requires a minimum amount of academic effort.
Sure, you can continue to enrol but a years-long stint at uni repeating the same courses isn’t going to make your CV dazzle future employers.
Cinderella (1950)
The Movie Life Lesson: Being unhappy with life and having aspirations for a better one, you can get what you want by simply dreaming about it.
Why It’s Impossible In Real Life: You can’t grab ahold of your dreams by sitting around at home moping! Effort, planning and a sense of your own self-worth are essential in achieving what you’ve always desired.
Field Of Dreams (1989)
The Movie Life Lesson: Sinking time and money into a project based on a vision will turn out for the best.
Why It’s Impossible In Real Life: If you build it, he will come, eh?
The only thing that’d come is the bank for your house. We all know that ghosts don’t cough up when the tab arrives.
Gem Seddon is 12DOVE's west coast Entertainment News Reporter, working to keep all of you updated on all of the latest and greatest movies and shows on streaming platforms like Netflix and Amazon Prime. Outside of entertainment journalism, Gem can frequently be found writing about the alternative health and wellness industry, and obsessing over all things Aliens and Terminator on Twitter.