Risky Business (1983)
Original Line: "Just say 'fuck'. If you can't say it, you can't do it."
Edited Version: "Just say 'hell'. If you can't say it, you can't do it."
Ummm, advice to live by.
Caddyshack (1980)
Original Line: “Hey everybody! Let's all get laid!”
Edited Version : “Hey everybody! Let's all take a shower!”
Which doesn't exactly clean this line up, does it?
The Matrix (1999)
Original Line: "If Morpheus had told us the truth, we would have told him to shove that red pill right up his ass!"
Edited Version : "If Morpheus had told us the truth, we would have told him to shove that red pill right up his ear!"
Give a whole new meaning to the term 'earful'.
Blade: Trinity (2004)
Original Line: "That tickle that you're feeling in the back of your throat right now? It's atomized colloidal silver. It's being pumped through the building's air-conditioning systems, you cock-juggling thundercunt!"
Edited Version: "That tickle that you're feeling in the back of your throat right now? It's atomized colloidal silver. It's being pumped through the building's air-conditioning systems, you crock-juggling chunderbump!"
Ryan Reynolds gets censored for TV and is even less coherent than usual.
There's Something About Mary (1998)
Original Line: "He was masturbating, he was masturbating!"
Edited Version: “Franks and Beans, Franks and Beans!”
Which is actually a recipe involving the unholy marriage of hot dogs and beans in a stew.
Clearly Mary's brother is a fan...
The Exorcist (1973)
Original Line: “Your mother sucks cocks in Hell.”
Edited Version: “Your mother knits socks that smell.”
Unbelievably sinister.
Ghostbusters (1984)
Original Line: "We came, we saw, we kicked its ass!"
Edited Version: "What a knockabout of pure fun that was."
Perhaps the worst example of Bowdlerisation ever – particularly insulting because the cast actually recorded this alternate version.
We thought better of them.
Scarface (1983)
Original Line: "This town is one big pussy just begging to be fucked."
Edited Version: "This town is one big chicken just begging to be plucked."
Which, obviously, makes so much more sense.
Pineapple Express (2008)
Original Line: Seth Rogen yells: “You're an asshole. That's all you are; an asshole.”
Edited Version: Seth Rogen yells: “You're a casserole! That's all you are; a casserole.”
Even funnier is James Franco's embittered response. “I'M NOT A CASSEROLE!”
You tell him, Franco.
Snakes On A Plane (2006)
Original Line: “I have had it with these mother-fucking snakes on this mother-fucking plane!”
Edited Version: “I have had it with these monkey-fighting snakes on this Monday to Friday plane!”
So funny that we wish this was in the actual movie.
