Elle Woods Legally Blonde (2001)
The Job: Lawyer
Why They Suck: There’s no glass ceiling at play here. If you leave your desk for hours on end in order to go looking for your dog, you deserve to get your P45. Sorry Elle.
Hoitz & Gamble The Other Guys (2010)
The Job: Police officers
Why They Suck: They’re the two most incompetent schmucks on the force, as demonstrated when a simple good-cop bad-cop routine degenerates into a horrendously unprofessional bad-cop bad-cop debacle. Shouting “America” as you crash a squad car also suggests they’re not taking it as seriously as they might.
Dewey Finn - School Of Rock (2003)
The Job: Substitute teacher
Why They Suck: Finn only gets the job by impersonating his flatmate, and when he begins teaching, it soon becomes clear that he’s hopeless. Sure, he forms a great band, but that shouldn’t appease the parents, particularly when it’s pretty much all he’s taught their children. This is a prep school for heaven’s sake!
Cinderella Cinderella (1950)
The Job: Cleaner
Why They Suck: We know she’s not a professional or anything, but of all the creatures we’d enlist to help out with the cleaning, rats and mice would probably be at the bottom of the list. Vermin!
Cal The 40 Year Old Virgin (2005)
The Job: Warehouse Operative
Why They Suck: Despite the fact that the stock he’s charged with moving, stacking and storing is highly fragile, Cal isn’t really one for careful handling. Plus, he’s usually stoned, which doesn’t really help.
Maria Fiore The Wedding Planner (2001)
The Job: Wedding Planner
Why They Suck: As a wedding planner, your primary objective is to ensure the big day goes without a hitch. Falling in love with the groom and then acting on those feelings lessens the odds on that happening…
Hancock Hancock (2008)
The Job: Superhero
Why They Suck: Being drunk on the job is never a great idea, but when you’re in possession of some heavy-duty superpowers, it’s even more of a problem. If you wouldn’t drink when handling heavy machinery, think of the implications here...
Peter Gibbons Office Space (1999)
The Job: IT Programmer
Why They Suck: Gibbons isn’t so much bad at his job as he is totally disillusioned with it. Indeed, he eventually gives up going in to work full stop, in order to pursue his lifelong dream of doing nothing.
Slater & Michaels Superbad (2007)
The Job: Police Officers
Why They Suck: Not only do they drink on the job, fire their guns indiscriminately and generally avoid their actual work, they also bring a minor along for the ride. A minor whose been caught buying booze with a fake ID. By the book…
Joseph Bruce Ismay Titanic (1997)
The Job: Manager of White Star Line
Why They Suck: Asmay was the manager on board who encourages the Captain to speed up, thinking of the good PR an early arrival would make for. We all know what happens next, but to make matters worse, Asmay is seen sneaking aboard a lifeboat! Rats and sinking ships…
