50 Greatest Movie Monarchs
Jubilee-tions to cinema's kings and queens
Priscilla
As Played By: A bus in The Adventures Of Priscilla, Queen Of The Desert (1994).
Watch The Throne: Unreliable tour bus used by fellow (drag) queens Bernadette, Mitzi and Felicia to travel across the Outback.
Monarch'ing Around: Not a real monarch, obviously, but surely the most fabulous mode of transportation for hundreds of miles. However, if it's actual kings and queens you're after...
Narissa
As Played By: Susan Sarandon in Enchanted (2007).
Watch The Throne: Animated rogue who casts Giselle (Amy Adams) out of the kingdom of Andalasia in order to prevent son Edward (James Marsden) from becoming king.
Monarch'ing Around: She's got all the tools of a wicked queen - chiefly poison apples - but is totally at sea in modern-day New York. Reality truly is stranger than fantasy.
Qin Shi Huang
As Played By: Chen Daoming in Hero (2002).
Watch The Throne: The King of Qin has dreams of unifying China, but first he must deal with the threat of assassination.
Monarch'ing Around: The King successfully convinces Nameless (Jet Li) to drop any plans to kill him and allow him to become Emperor.
Harold
As Played By: John Cleese in Shrek 2 (2004).
Watch The Throne: Ruler - along with wife Queen Lillian - of Far Far Away, who isn't best pleased when daughter Fiona turns up in ogre form and married to Shrek.
Monarch'ing Around: Harold is carrying a secret; he's really a frog - so all the anti-ogre sentiment is just displacement for his own neuroses.
Alfonso VI
As Played By: John Fraser in El Cid (1961).
Watch The Throne: Alfonso is only second in line when his father dies, but he wants to be King so badly he has his sister kill elder brother Sancho.
Monarch'ing Around: The new King is in a bind - his greatest knight El Cid (Charlton Heston) suspects him of the murder, but every time Alfonso tries to banish him, he realises he needs his knight for war duties.
The Red Queen
As Played By: Helena Bonham Carter in Alice In Wonderland (2010).
Watch The Throne: Huge-headed tyrant who uses the Jabberwocky to hold Underland (aka Wonderland) in a reign of terror.
Monarch'ing Around: The Red Queen is short-tempered and quick to anger, presumably because she's stuck in a garishly psychedelic madhouse.
Rudolph Rassendyll
As Played By: Ronald Colman in The Prisoner Of Zenda (1937).
Watch The Throne: Rassendyll is an English gent on holiday, when he's forced to take the place of his exact double Prince Rudolf and be crowned King.
Monarch'ing Around: He spends longer than he'd like playing ruler when the real King Rudolf is kidnapped.
Isabella
As Played By: Rachel Weisz in The Fountain (2006).
Watch The Throne : Spanish monarch who sends conquistador Tomas (Hugh Jackman) to the New World in search of the Tree of Life.
Monarch'ing Around: Tomas and Isabella's lives are but the blink of an eye in the grander scheme of the cosmos... assuming their love is real and not a novel being written by terminally ill Izzi (also Weisz).
Akasha
As Played By: Aaliyah in Queen Of The Damned (2002).
Watch The Throne: The first vampire, who must be kept alive in order to protect all other vampires.
Monarch'ing Around: Akasha is released from slumber by the heavy metal music played by Lestat (Stuart Townsend), which probably tells you all you need to know about someone who thinks blood tastes nice.
Mary I of Scotland
As Played By: Vanessa Redgrave in Mary, Queen Of Scots (1971).
Watch The Throne: Queen of Scotland aged 3, widow of the King of France aged 18. No wonder she fancies having a go at the English crown, too.
Monarch'ing Around: She's too busy sleeping around to mount a serious attack on the English, so Queen Elizabeth (Glenda Jackson) captures Mary and imprisons her in a tower.
Margaret Of Valois
As Played By: Isabelle Adjani in La Reine Margot (1994).
Watch The Throne: French princess forced into an arranged marriage with Henry, King of Navarre (Daniel Auteuil) to attempt a peace between Catholics and Huguenots.
Monarch'ing Around: In reality, the Catholics are scheming to have the Huguenots massacred on St Bartholomew's Day, a slaughter instigated by Margot's mother, Catherine de Medici (Virna Lisi).
Alexander The Great
As Played By: Colin Farrell in Alexander (2004).
Watch The Throne: King of Macedon who conquered huge parts of Asia, presumably to show his ego was bigger than parents Val Kilmer and Angelina Jolie.
Monarch'ing Around: Alexander is often more interested in playing around with best friend Hephaestion (Jared Leto) than battles.
Henry II
As Played By: Peter O'Toole in Becket (1964).
Watch The Throne: The 12th Century King makes buddy Thomas Becket (Richard Burton) Archbishop of Canterbury, and ends up taking a supporting role in his protégé's story.
Monarch'ing Around: No wonder Becket takes the starring role - Henry's a weak-willed delinquent more interested in boozing and carousing than doing a king's job.
Lamia
As Played By: Michelle Pfeiffer in Stardust (2007).
Watch The Throne: Witch-queen of Stormhold, who keeps her good looks only by eating the hearts of star-women.
Monarch'ing Around: Sprightly as long as she's got the energy, but when she slips into her natural old age (around 400 years) it's another story.
Edward I
As Played By: Patrick McGoohan in Braveheart (1995).
Watch The Throne: Meet Edward Longshanks, King of England from 1272 to 1307. Braveheart is a Scottish story, so inevitably Edward is the villain.
Monarch'ing Around: Longshanks illegally takes Scottish land, starting a chain of events that will see Murron (Catherine McCormack) executed and her husband William Wallace (Mel Gibson) foment a nationalist rebellion.
Christina
As Played By: Greta Garbo in Queen Christina (1933).
Watch The Throne: Real-life ruler of Sweden from 1633 to 1654, who abdicated her throne in a cloud of controversy.
Monarch'ing Around: The history books say Christina left Sweden for religious reasons; Hollywood recasts it as a doomed love story, as Christina falls for Spanish envoy Antonio (John Gilbert).
Baldwin IV
As Played By: Edward Norton in Kingdom Of Heaven (2005).
Watch The Throne: King of Jerusalem during the Crusades, unfortunately blighted by leprosy.
Monarch'ing Around: It's not easy to lead an army when you're dying and forced to hide behind a mask.
Hidetora
As Played By: Tatsuya Nakadai in Ran (1985).
Watch The Throne: Patriarch of the Ichimonji clan who foolishly carves up his kingdom between three sons.
Monarch'ing Around: As per the source material (Shakespeare's King Lear), Hidetora's children begin a bloody civil war that drives their father mad until he's wandering homeless in the wilderness.
Catherine The Great
As Played By: Marlene Dietrich in The Scarlet Empress (1932).
Watch The Throne: Wife of Russian Tsar Peter III, who succeeds her husband as ruler when he is assassinated in a coup she helped to bring about.
Monarch'ing Around: The Queen's portrayed as a sex-mad dominatrix. Well, it's cold in Russia; they have to keep warm somehow, don't they?
Gertrude
As Played By: Julie Christie in Hamlet (1996).
Watch The Throne: Widow of King Hamlet, but still a Queen because she has hastily married the late King's brother and heir, Claudius (Derek Jacobi).
Monarch'ing Around: Gertrude's son Prince Hamlet (Kenneth Branagh) reckons Uncle Claudius killed the king - he knows because Daddy's ghost told him - and he isn't terribly happy about Mummy's new marriage.
Borg Queen
As Played By: Alice Krige in Star Trek: First Contact (1997).
Watch The Throne: Even the emotionless gestalt of the Borg need a figurehead.
Monarch'ing Around: Clearly, the more uniform the subjects, the more of a sexy alien diva their ruler is going to be. But surely, if they're a gestalt, all of the Borg should be like her?
Agamemnon
As Played By: Sean Connery in Time Bandits (1981).
Watch The Throne: Greek ruler fabled for leading an army against Troy, if only he could slay that damned Minotaur.
Monarch'ing Around: The unlikely arrival of time-travelling schoolboy Kevin (Craig Warnock) solves the man-bull problem and, albeit temporarily, gives him a surrogate son to pass on his heroism to.
Marie Antoinette
As Played By: Kirsten Dunst in Marie Antoinette (2006).
Watch The Throne: Austrian wife of Louis XVI of France, whose profligate lifestyle helped to drive the French people to revolution.
Monarch'ing Around: Being a queen is such a drag, so let's party, yeah?
Padme Amidala
As Played By: Natalie Portman in Star Wars Episode 1: The Phantom Menace (1999).
Watch The Throne: Teenage ruler of Naboo, a fierce opponent of the Trade Federation and therefore a target for assassination.
Monarch'ing Around: In later prequels, Padme becomes a political hotshot in the Galactic Senate; presumably, she's too busy to notice her fella, Anakin, is turning to the Dark Side. Still, cute twins.
Genghis Khan
As Played By: Tadanobu Asano in Mongol (2007).
Watch The Throne: The story of how young tribesman Temujin ascends to become Genghis Khan - literally, the King of Kings.
Monarch'ing Around: Sensing a loss of traditional values, Temujin raises his army not to rape and pillage, but to unite the tribes. Under his leadership, of course.
Odin
As Played By: Anthony Hopkins in Thor (2011).
Watch The Throne: Godlike King of Asgard - conqueror of the Frost Giants but a bit of a pushover when it comes to his children.
Monarch'ing Around: Odin banishes his good son Thor (Chris Hemsworth) to Earth, which is just what scheming bad son Loki (Tom Hiddlestone) needs to be able to take charge.
Cleopatra
As Played By: Elizabeth Taylor in Cleopatra (1963).
Watch The Throne: Young Queen of Egypt, struggling to assert her authority despite being under Roman rule.
Monarch'ing Around: Cleo manages to upset Rome the old-fashioned way; she seduces Mark Anthony (Richard Burton) and causes a civil war between him and fellow Roman ruler Octavian (Roddy McDowall).
Macbeth
As Played By: Jon Finch in Macbeth (1971).
Watch The Throne: Scottish lord who goes kill-crazy at the first hint he might become King of Scotland.
Monarch'ing Around: Macbeth isn't much of a leader, forever bowing down to female influence from the witches who give him the crazy notion in the first place, to his wife who urges him to go through with it.
Carlotta
As Played By: Edith Massey in Desperate Living (1977).
Watch The Throne: Dignity-challenged head of Mortville, a shanty town populated by criminal riff-raff and situated on a rubbish dump.
Monarch'ing Around: What's the best way to pretend you're not in charge of a craphole? Force your subjects into demeaning activities so you can berate them for their stupidity.
Danny Dravot
As Played By: Sean Connery in The Man Who Would Be King (1975).
Watch The Throne: Roguish adventurer who sets off with buddy Peachy Carnehan (Michael Caine) and is mistaken as the son of Alexander The Great.
Monarch'ing Around: Power goes to Danny's head, and it's not long before he's trying to "modernise" the natives and making Peachy bow down to him.
Elessar Telcontar
As Played By: Viggo Mortensen in The Lord Of The Rings: The Return Of The King (2003).
Watch The Throne: Rightful heir to the throne of Gondor. You might know him better as Aragorn.
Monarch'ing Around: He's got a long journey ahead of him if he wants to claim his kingship. Good job his nickname is Strider.
Bavmorda
As Played By: Jean Marsh in Willow (1988).
Watch The Throne: Ruler of Nockmaar, who's quite happy making everyone's life miserable until she hears a prophecy that a new-born child will cause her downfall.
Monarch'ing Around: She's canny enough to lock all pregnant women in her fortress, but after a midwife and dwarf Willow (Warwick Davis) help the magic baby to escape her clutches, it might have been easier if Bavmorda had simply bribed everybody.
Leonidas
As Played By: Gerard Butler in 300 (2007).
Watch The Throne: The King of Sparta, who doesn't take kindly to being threatened by Persian King Xerxes.
Monarch'ing Around: Leonidas isn't afraid to dine in hell, if the sacrifice means uniting his people against Persian oppression. And he only needs 300 men to make the point.
King Ralph
As Played By: John Goodman in King Ralph (1991).
Watch The Throne: When the entire Royal Family is wiped out in a freak electrocution, Ralph is found to be next in line.
Monarch'ing Around: Ralph is a slobbish Vegas entertainer who would much rather be hitting on strippers than fulfilling matters of state.
George III
As Played By: Nigel Hawthorne in The Madness Of King George (1994).
Watch The Throne: Towards the end of his reign at the turn of the 19th Century, George "goes mad."
Monarch'ing Around: While his son plots to become Regent, George is being forced into behavioural modification by radical Dr Willis (Ian Holm).
Mongkut
As Played By: Yul Brynner in The King And I (1956).
Watch The Throne: The King of Siam during the 1860s, caught between the traditions of his country and his desire to be seen as a modern leader.
Monarch'ing Around: Although he'd deny it, he's fallen in love with his children's tutor, Anna Leonowens (Deborah Kerr) - the only woman with the temerity to stand above him and break a Thai taboo.
Eleanor of Aquitane
As Played By: Katharine Hepburn in The Lion In Winter (1968).
Watch The Throne: Estranged wife of King Henry II, who doesn't let the small matter of being locked in a tower get in the way of royal business.
Monarch'ing Around: Eleanor and Henry are locked in dispute over who should succeed the throne - she favours Richard, he prefers John. Eventually, both will get their way.
Alien Queen
As Played By: Special effects wizardry in Aliens (1986).
Watch The Throne: Think the standard-issue xenomorph is a badass? Wait until you've met their mother.
Monarch'ing Around: On the plus side, she gets to lounge around all day while the kids are doing all the work of harvesting humans. On the downside, she's constantly laying eggs.
Richard III
As Played By: Ian McKellen in Richard III (1995).
Watch The Throne: In real-life, King of England between 1483 and 1485. Here, twice-removed - first by Shakespeare's play, and then by updating the action to the 1930s.
Monarch'ing Around: A Fascist humpback with delusions of grandeur, Richard schemes to steal the crown by locking the rightful heirs - the two princes - in the Tower Of London.
Jareth
As Played By: David Bowie in Labyrinth (1986).
Watch The Throne: The Goblin King, able to transform himself into an owl and to manipulate space and time.
Monarch'ing Around: This mischievous monarch apparently waits around all day for girls to renounce their baby brothers so he has an excuse to test his labyrinth.
King Kong
As Played By: Stop-motion magic in King Kong (1933).
Watch The Throne: Technically not a king, but who's going to argue with the biggest ape on Skull Island?
Monarch'ing Around: The arrival of a film crew from America causes a constitutional crisis, as Kong is kidnapped and taken to New York.
Mufasa
As Played By: James Earl Jones in The Lion King (1994).
Watch The Throne: Ruler of the Pride Lands, and doting dad to son Simba.
Monarch'ing Around: Mufasa's parental duties leave him blind to the treachery of brother Scar, but at least he's instilled the right values in Simba to eventually take his place.
Queen Victoria
As Played By: Judi Dench in Mrs Brown (1997).
Watch The Throne: Several decades into her reign, Victoria has to cope on her own after the death of husband Prince Albert.
Monarch'ing Around: Courtiers' plan to get Victoria's servant John Brown (Billy Connolly) to bring the Queen out of her shell go so well that soon there are whispers of scandal.
Henry VIII
As Played By: Charles Laughton in The Private Life Of Henry VIII (1933).
Watch The Throne: The King of England executes Anne Boleyn in 1536, and spends the rest of his life looking for the perfect wife. Good luck with that, Henry.
Monarch'ing Around: Henry spends so long swapping wives it's a miracle he gets any work done.
George VI
As Played By: Colin Firth in The King's Speech (2010).
Watch The Throne: Accidental monarch George is crowned only because his brother Edward fancies divorced Americans, which is bad news because George has a terrible stutter.
Monarch'ing Around: George has to enlist the help of speech therapist Lionel Logue (Geoffrey Rush) so he can rouse Britain to take on the Nazis.
Henry V
As Played By: Laurence Olivier in Henry V (1944).
Watch The Throne: As told by Shakespeare, The Cronicle History of King Henry the Fift with His Battell Fought at Agincourt in France.
Monarch'ing Around: Henry makes rousing speeches but he doesn't just talk the talk, crossing the Channel to whup the French army.
Queen Grimhilde
As Played By: Lucille La Verne in Snow White And The Seven Dwarfs (1937).
Watch The Throne: No longer the fairest of them all. At least, that's what her magic mirror says.
Monarch'ing Around: When a hapless huntsman fails to get the job done, Grimhilde disguises herself as a hag to try and poison Snow White. Now she really isn't the fairest of them all.
Elizabeth II
As Played By: Helen Mirren in The Queen (2006).
Watch The Throne: Following the death of Princess Diana in 1997, the Queen faces unprecedented public attention on how she will react.
Monarch'ing Around: Her Majesty has to choose whether to side with the traditionalist Duke of Edinburgh (James Cromwell) or touchy-feely moderniser Tony Blair (Michael Sheen). Only a Red Stag can tell her what to do.
King Arthur
As Played By: Graham Chapman in Monty Python And The Holy Grail (1975).
Watch The Throne: Medieval legends tells that Arthur went forth to seek the Holy Grail, even though his people question that it's wrong to wield supreme executive power just because some watery tart threw a sword at you.
Monarch'ing Around: To be honest, everybody's against Arthur - the French, the Knights who say Ni, the killer Rabbit of Caerbannog…
Elizabeth I
As Played By: Cate Blanchett in Elizabeth (1998).
Watch The Throne: Protestant Elizabeth is crowned during a time of political and religious turmoil from Catholic agitators.
Monarch'ing Around: Elizabeth learns to become a ruler the hard way - giving up sex to become the bad-ass Virgin Queen.