Punisher
The Character: Vietnam vet Frank Castle has killed more than 4,000 people during his tour of duty in his own personal war against crime.
He started out killing crooks to avenge his family, who were gunned down by gangsters, but we reckon he carried on because he enjoys the smell of shotgun smoke.
Most Violent Moment: So many to choose from, but his epic Marvel Max scrap with psycho hitman Barracuda is up there.
Pit Frank against a villain so deranged he hums and sings after having his eye gouged out and his fingers cut off and there will be blood.
If It Was Filmed: To be fair, Punisher War Zone is one of the most violent films ever made. Sadly, it’s also one of the shittest.
But if Barracuda had been thrown into the mix, we probably would never have to suffer through it, as the censors would go into so many apoplectic seizures, the thing would never have made it out of the certification booth.
Conan The Barbarian
The Character: He’s called a barbarian for a reason. In the Conan comics, decapitations are more common than coughs in December.
Most Violent Moment: Even the earliest Conan short stories were drenched in blood – The Scarlet Citidel saw more than five thousand Aquilonian knights meet their doom during one of Conan’s quests.
If It Was Filmed: It would need a bigger budget than all of the previous Conan films combined. And it would probably need to be directed by Peter Jackson and James Cameron.
Lobo
The Character: Lobo is the baddest bastich in the universe, riding through the stars on the back of a spaceship shaped like a Hell’s Angels motorbike.
Most Violent Moment: Lobo’s only been killed once; and when he accidentally ended up in heaven, he proceeded to kill every single deity in the place to convince the men upstairs they should reincarnate him back into the fight that cost him his life.
It’s INSANELY brutal. At one point, Lobo kicks someone in the nuts so hard his spine flies out in a shower of grue. It probably goes without saying that it’s one of our favourite comics ever.
If It Was Filmed: Everyone involved would probably get arrested.
The Joker
The Character: Perma-grin loony tune with a love for chaos and making Batman’s life a misery. Some men just love to watch the world burn.
Most Violent Moment: This guy doesn’t need guns to get his dirty work done – no, The Joker’s far more hands-on when it comes to violence.
Take the way he murders Robin (aka Jason Todd). He beats him to a bloody pulp with a crowbar, then blows him up.
If It Was Filmed: It’d be even harder to stomach than the head-bashing elevator bit from Drive .
Wolverine
The Character: Damn near indestructible thanks to a self-healing mutant gene, Wolverine aka Logan is the baddest of the X-Men, with his extendable claws and seriously short temper. Bad. Ass.
Most Violent Moment: Wolvie’s got a thing for violence (something about having claws for fists), but surely sinking those razors into Sabretooth’s head is one of his most out-and-out goriest.
If It Was Filmed: It’d be the first X-Men film to receive an 18 rating.
Michonne
The Character: Walking Dead ’s most ball-busting babe, Michonne is a mysterious survivor whom Rick and his company discover as they seek out help in a world overrun with zombies.
She has a katana, which is pretty much everything you need to know about her.
Most Violent Moment: Though she’s played the victim more than once (having been both assaulted and raped), Michonne knows how to deal the pain, too.
She’s killed at least 12 people (and countless zombies). Most violent was her massacre of the contestants in a gladiator competition overseen by the mad Governor.
If It Was Filmed: It’d blow Ridley Scott’s Gladiator out of the water in terms of jaw-dropping levels of violence.
Rorschach
The Character: Son to an abusive prostitute, Rorschach began fighting crime after despairing over the lack of empathy he witnessed in the world.
Most Violent Moment: Banged up in prison, Rorschach is confronted by a hoard of criminals he himself was responsible for banging up.
When one of the inmates attacks Rorschach with a screwdriver, our funny-faced hero retaliates by hurling the boiling hot contents of a deep-fat fryer in his attacker’s face.
If It Was Filmed: Jackie Earle Haley would be the perfect Rorschach. Oh wait...
Spider Jerusalem
The Character: A foul-mouthed gonzo journo, Spider is a drug addict best known for his ability to come up with sick but hilarious insults. Which he does a lot, because he has a rotten temper.
Most Violent Moment: Spider is at his sickest and most violent when he’s using his deadliest weapon: the bowel disruptor.
A multi-setting gadget, it causes his victims to lose control of their bowels, with various side effects including diarrhoea and rectal prolapse. Nice.
If It Was Filmed: It’d be even messier than that episode of South Park where everybody dies and soils themselves.
Ogami Itto
The Character: Having previously worked as a Shogun's executioner, Ogami was forced to become an assassin when his name was disgraced by the Yagy clan.
Now he and his three-year-old son are out for revenge against the evil clan.
Most Violent Moment: More violent-minded than violence enacted. Itto gives his one-year-old son Daigor a choice between playing with a ball or a sword.
If he chooses the ball, Itto will kill him. Luckily, the little fella goes for the blade. Close one.
If It Was Filmed: It has been, several times. Check out the insanely violent Lone Wolf & Cub film series, or the awesome America remix Shogun Assassin.
Judge Dredd
The Character: A futuristic law enforcer, Dredd runs Mega-City One with a constant grimace and a massive flipping gun.
According to creator John Wagner, the fact that we never see Dredd’s face represents the “facelessness of justice”.
Most Violent Moment: Dredd has battled aliens and mutants with bucket-loads of grit.
If It Was Filmed: Karl Urban is cinema’s new Dredd (it’s out next year). Let’s hope he can erase the memory of Sly’s Dreddful movie adap from our minds.
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